2020年6月30日 星期二

Places I'd Rather Be


Damn this office is hot.  31 degrees outside; 66% humidity.  By noon it'll be up to 34 degrees, and it's hotter in here than it is outside.  Those fans can only do so much.  

And no, we don't have air-conditioning.  Our school doesn't want to foot the bill.  Some of my coworkers are even convinced that this is a "green building," and that it's somehow cooler inside than it actually is.

If you have air-conditioning, wherever you are, please know that I hate you.

The heat wouldn't be so bad if I had something to do.  As it is I can only sit here, like everyone else, pretending to be busy.  The semester's almost over, the tests are done, and most of us have only a handful of classes left.

I guess I could get up and go talk to someone.  But that would involve getting up.  That would also involve walking.  The minute I get up and begin walking I start sweating all over again, and I've sweated enough for today.  I'd rather just sit here and nurse my mug of rapidly warming water.

When it gets so hot it's hard not to think about places I'd rather be.  Normally I'm fine at work, but when it gets this hot I have trouble staying positive.  The end of this semester is even worse thanks to the coronavirus, having been extended to July.  In July the heat is... formidable.

No, I'd rather not think about this place.  I'd rather think about other places, far away.  I'd rather imagine myself up in the mountains, where a cool breeze rustles through the trees.  I'm in the mountains and I'm sitting in the shade.  There's an ice cold beer in my hand, music is playing from somewhere nearby, and I can smell pork cooking over a fire.

Or I'm back in the States, sitting in an air-conditioned restaurant.  This restaurant smells like the best pizza you've ever had, and all my family and friends are sitting around me, glancing up at neon beer signs and talking over the sound of video games.  We're drinking from glasses full of ice, and we're talking about going swimming later on.

Or maybe I am in this office, but the weather has turned wintry.  One of my coworkers is complaining about how "cold" it is, and I'm answering with: "Cold?  You call this cold?  I call it DELIGHTFUL."

Swimming in a cool lake, sitting in an air-conditioned restaurant, sitting in the shade, or having the weather turn cold: all of these things sound better than sitting in this hot, sweaty office with the fans stirring the humid air.  I'd even be happy sitting in the 7-11 down the road, perhaps drinking a cold coffee, perhaps drinking something else.  Life is good when you're not sweating into your keyboard.  Life is grand when you're not inhaling your own stench, and dreaming of a cool shower.

Oh well.  When I think about it, there are only a few hours yet to go.  After lunch I can go home, take a shower, turn on the air-conditioning, and watch a movie.  I'll be cool then, and life will be worth living.

32 degrees outside, 67% humidity.  I'm trying and failing to think of other, colder places, and other, cooler things I could be doing.  Why does it have to be so HOT in here?  Why does it have to be so much hotter than it is outside?

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