1. You will never need to look that hard for a taxi (there are taxis EVERYWHERE). 你不用花很多時間找計程車 (到處都是).
2. If you are bored and have nothing else to do, there is always something new to protest. 如果你覺得無聊而且也無事可做的話, 可以隨便找個理由去抗議.
3. You will never lack T-shirts bearing strange English phrases. 你到處可買到寫著奇怪的英文句子的T恤.
4. The food will always be oily enough. 食物一定夠油膩.
5. All traffic laws are relative. 不一定要遵守交通規則.
6. Driving in Taipei offers a great opportunity to listen to ALL of the songs on your MP3. 在新北市開車能讓你聽完你MP3裡所有的歌.
7. Cockroaches, although shy, are both cheap and loyal companions. They will love you even after you try to smash them with a shoe! 害羞的蟑螂可是便宜又忠誠的寵物. 就算你要用鞋砸扁牠們, 牠們還是愛你.
8. Your "betel nut smile" will drive the ladies wild. 男人的"檳榔微笑"能讓小姐們趨之瘋狂.
9. Senior citizens on scooters will always make your morning commute more exciting. 騎著機車的年長者能讓你的早上上班路程很刺激.
10. As with taxis, you will NEVER need to look for a 7-11. 跟找計程車一樣, 你也不用花時間找7-11!
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The Near Future in the Present Tense
Birth of a Nation?
Semicoherent Thoughts on China
Mandarin in Taiwanese Elementary Schools